God bless Texas in July!

YOU KNOW YOU ARE IN TEXAS IN JULY WHEN. . . .

The birds have to use potholders to pull worms out of the ground.

The trees are whistling for the dogs.

The best parking place is determined by shade instead of distance.

Hot water now comes out of both taps.

You can make sun tea instantly.

You learn that a seat belt buckle makes a pretty good branding iron!

The temperature drops below 95 and you feel a little chilly.

You discover that in July it only takes 2 fingers to steer your car.

You discover that you can get sunburned through your car window.

You actually burn your hand opening the car door.

You break into a sweat the instant you step outside at 7:30 a.m.

Your biggest bicycle wreck fear is, "What if I get knocked out and end up
lying on the pavement and cook to death?"

You realize that asphalt has a liquid state.

The potatoes cook underground, so all you have to do is pull one out and add
butter, salt and pepper.

Farmers are feeding their chickens crushed ice to keep them from laying
boiled eggs. The cows are giving evaporated milk. Ah, what a place to call
home.

God Bless Our State of TEXAS !!!

Comments

mikim said…
This is positively priceless!
Michelle said…
What is scary is that some of these things are not exaggerations...

I love the one about the potholders! :-)
Lin said…
LOL -- so is it hot??? LOL
tinker said…
Cute! I lived in Texas for a couple of years, about 25 years ago now - I still remember the saying: If you don't like the weather in Texas, wait five minutes!
Thanks for the laugh!
:-)
Linda T said…
So true, so true! Thanks for the laughs.